How to choose a life partner in an arranged marriage?


The concept of arranged marriages has changed. And, not just for men. As a woman, your life partner should be a person with whom you can exchange interests and who will motivate your independence. Friends or parents suggest or set up the pair and let them talk via email or phone, let them meet a few times, and then consult for a conclusion. If the duo announces No, it’s a No. Nonetheless, when parents are referred to this, there will certainly be some difficulty as they can’t help but give their advice and conclusion, opinion.

WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING FOR? : The main thing to resist is to make a list you can make it mentally that what qualities or what you prefer or you would like/want in your life partner, so you can concentrate nicely on your search. Relying on your priorities and preferences, some aspects that might be taken into concern. Like education qualifications, job, family background, salary, location, appearance like height, looks, weight, etc., caste, values like moderate, traditional or liberal, habits like smoking, drinking, etc., social standing, etc.

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BACKGROUND RESEARCH: Nevertheless, digging the boy’s background likely appear painstaking, but it is very important and fundamental. The complication of inquiring goes up a notch when the boy is in a foreign country, abroad, mostly if you don’t have any friends or relatives to help you out there. Therefore, it would be reasonable to make careful inquiries outside with the help of friends and relatives, with respect to his family background, education, job, age, financial condition, habits, medical history, lifestyle, etc. If in case you have any doubt about his job you can get employer proof to find out whether or not he is working there or not. Definitely check the visa status. Besides, communicate regularly through phone, email, chat, etc. to get a truer idea about the person.

MEET YOUR PARTNER PERSONALLY: Generally, arrange marriage becomes a crucial business for the bride’s and groom’s parents. A major part of the plannings, work, and inquiries are executed by your parents and you just sit on a couch nodding and smiling just like a clown. But let me bring it clearly to your notice, you’re incredibly spoiling your life if you’re doing that. Even though it’s arranged marriage, take a stand for your options and confirmation and go forward to meet your would-be spouse personally/privately to know him better which would certainly help you to mix with him, his interests, his likes, dislikes, and even family.

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ASK AWAY: It’s absolutely okay to raise any questions that you have in your mind. However, keep in mind that timing is the key. It can be thoroughly offensive and insulting if the first and foremost question will be How much do you earn, both gross and net? But at times, information is not offered freely and one hesitates to raise a question. However, if the answer to a question is crucial in carrying matters further, there is no risk in raising a question. Possibly the person you ask will feel offended. However, when you are putting up with such an important decision, you have to take that risk. Isn’t it fine that they feel bad now, instead of you feeling worse later?

CONSIDER PERSONALITY OVERLOOKS: 7 out of 10 population’s first tendency while selecting a life partner in arranged marriage looks. The maximum of the people expects their life partners to be good looking which is totally reasonable. Yet getting a life partner exactly how you want is unpredictable. It’s wise to rate your partner on the scale of personality and to be logistics and not on the looks which is the considerably important thing to assume while choosing a life partner in arrange marriage, in fact, there are very limited chances for you to get married to a guy looking great. If your life partner has some dress sense and is dressed and can flawlessly carry himself/herself well with whatever natural looks he/she is blessed or gifted with, then believe me you can go for it.

PREVIOUS RELATIONSHIPS: It is not extraordinary at all to have had a previous relationship. It relies on many aspects like what type of relationship, feelings, duration, etc. As far as it is a stuff of the past and he/she is now engaged to his marriage, that would possibly not mind. Arranged marriages include the whole family and private data becoming known in the open could have serious repercussions, so some may not sincerely disclose this aspect.

YOU SHOULD HAVE RESPECT FOR ONE ANOTHER: You obviously cannot devour your life with a person who has no respect for you or your goals/dreams or your personality. So, select a person who will appreciate you for the rest of your life.

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1. Are you ready for marriage? 2. How would you describe yourself? 3. What are you looking for in a partner? 4. How do you perceive about drinking and smoking? 5. How do you love to use your free time? 6. How much time do you want to conclude? 7. What are your priorities, in terms of food is it like vegetarian or non-vegetarian? 8. What is your family like 9. How do you feel about pets? 10. What are your likes and dislikes? 11. How do you behave when you get upset? 12. How frequently will we stop by our extended family, if living apart from them? 13. Do you believe in sharing housework? 14. Appropriate questions on the profession front: 15. What are your future career plans? 16. How much time do you spend at the job? 17. What would we do in the circumstance that I get shifted?

Finally, there should be common respect, consent, and understanding from both opinions; only then can a marriage be maintained.

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